Target

I love books.

Target by Kathleen Jefferie Johnson.

It's about a teenage boy who was raped, and it is really, really. good. It sort of reminds me of Speak by Laurie Anderson - but not in that copy-cat, shadow-of-the-original way. It's more like, a similar situation with a different person. It feels individual and unique, but is the same 'kind' of story.

It's a short book, only took about four hours to read, but the characters are Real. They are people, not words on a page. On top of that the story telling is excellent, there were times where I was literally laughing out loud with how wonderful these guys were, and times where I was shriveling up because I just wanted to cry.

Very good book, I highly recommend it. It's one of those books that reminds me why I love reading so much.

KUMORICON, DAY 1

Because it is...
KUMORICON, DAY 1.

(WARNING: The following post is IMAGE INTENSE, and not friendly to low-level internet connections!)

The day starts with waking up late. No one remembered to set the alarm clock, unfortunately. So we RUSH to get to the convention center, by the time we get there the Opening Ceremonies have already started. So we drop into the Pre Reg line and grab our badges, which takes about ten minutes rather than three hours, as everyone is at Opening Ceremonies. SUCH a blessing. We get to opening ceremonies as the Taiko performance is finishing up, so we're not too late, but we're way back in the nose bleed seats (thank god for cameras with telescopic lenses).



Then our awesome Master Of Ceremonies makes his way onto the stage~!



After him we get briefed on the Convention Rules by some in-character Organization members who seem to believe we're applying for a job rather than attending a convention. They show us a video, which is actually pretty funny.



Master of Ceremonies than introduces us to the Pirates VS Ninjas Bucket Game. On the Pirates side we have Luffy, on the Ninjas side we have Sasuke. The most FANTASTIC match up, like way.



Luffy wins.
(I never doubted him.)

I wander around the convention center for a while, finding some fantastic cosplayers and the like:







...and eventually find the Dealers Hall, which for some reason is in the sub-basement parking lot. Don't ask me why, I haven't a clue. The line to get in is pretty short, but it still takes half an hour to get in. I wander around slack jawed and in happy awe for quite a while.

Eventually I find the dealer with the One Piece PVC figures (not the POP's, while I slobbered over those, I couldn't afford them).



I sink some cash and buy me Law. He's fantastic and standing next to me as I type this. I'll shoot some pictures of him later this weekend.

On the way up out of the Dealers Hall I run int Edgeworth~!



And Klavier!



They could tell I was a fangirl right away, as I happen to be wearing my "I BELIEVE IN MILES EDGEWORTH" T-Shirt. Which, by the way, I've had quite a few people tell me the love.

I continue to wander around happily until my first Panel, the FUNimation Sneak Peak. I got quite lost, but was helped along my way to the panel by a wonderful Yaoi fan by the name of Jason. He hung out with me for the FUNi panel. Which had a good turn out. Here we have the crowd:



But I didn't get many pictures other than that. They showed us some clips of upcoming shows, many of which were hilarious and the crowd laughed uproariously for. I was hoping for some news on One Piece, but no luck. I'll have to check out the FUNi industry panel later this weekend.

Next Panel was an Intro to Cosplay Photography, where we covered some basics. It was really fun, and we got to practice on some poor sap (AKA: Volunteer) from the audience. Here's my best shots (withOUT photoshopping them):




Then I went to go stand in line for the Apples To Apples: Convention Edition panel.



As for Convention lines, some things never change.

The Panel was really fun, I ran into Jason again and we played in the same game. It was insane and funny and quite fantastic.

I then went out to get some lunch with my dad. The convention was bleeding out onto the streets, cosplayers everywheeeere!




After lunch it was time for the next funtastiac panel of the day, Kumoricon Comedy Event. We got there early while the guys were still setting up, and said guys played 20 Questions with the audience until it was time for the panel to start.

The Panel was fantastic, really fun.The comedians were a little bit rusty, new to the game and all, but that didn't detract from the performance. I laughed a bunch and it was worth the time.

(The room lighting did not lend well to photos)






Although after a while in that underground room, I started to feel like a mole or something. XD The sunlight when we got back up to ground level was quite a surprise.

I took a spin around the gaming room, which is back underground and really does feel like you're back in your mother's basement:


...and that brings us up to now, where I'm taking a break from the Con. I'll head back over later this night at 8:30 to pick up my last panel of the night, a "Mini-Manga Contest" (no clue what that entails), and then I'll probably be off to bed. It SUCKS not to have an 18+ pass for the night events. >.>;

Also worth noting:
I never actually found the Artist Alley today. Apparently it's located down in the parking lot next to the dealer's hall, but I didn't find out until it was already closed. I'll have to make my way over there tomorrow morning to waste - I mean INVEST - the rest of my money.

(IF YOU ARE A COSPLAYER AND YOU SEE YOURSELF IN MY PHOTOS, EMAIL ME AT ONECOOLC@HOTMAIL.COM, AND I WILL SEND YOU THE LARGER SIZED PHOTO.)

I hate summer break.

I wish summer break was over already.

I AM SO FUCKING LONELY.

Angel of Death

Oh man, I need to blog more. I really do. I love to write, I love to talk. Why on earth did I stop? I'll try to pick it back up. Y'know, that whole daily thing? Yeah.

Anyways. On to today's topic.

I got dragged into JulNo. I decided, "Hey, writing is good for the soul! I might as well give it my best shot!", and it started really well. I had a fantastic idea.

Plot Summary:
Our main character is Chelsea. Chelsea Dies. When Chelsea dies she becomes an Angel of Death. So now she follows people around until they die. She decides to bend the rules a bit and tell people their going to die before they actually do. The book deals with a lot of death-related-issues.

That sounds kind of bland, but when I was explaining it earlier it sounded better. I was really excited to write this book. Then I started, and there was one teeeensy little problem:

I couldn't hear Chelsea. She didn't have a voice.

Writing her just wasn't fun. She wasn't a person I knew or could get to know, she wasn't a person at all. Chelsea did things because the plot needed her to, she didn't do them because that's what she wanted to do personally. Now, anyone who knows me knows I am heavily character driven. Whatever I write, the people are the most important prospect. Plot? Screw plot. If I have awesome characters they'll do something interesting eventually.

And because of my dependence on my characters, I couldn't write this book. I've been screwing around with writing some other stuff, y'know, nothing big. Some terrible, OOC, slashy, sex-filled Snape/Draco fanfic, a bit of extra stuff with the characters from Delinquent, some role play. And because of my screwing around I've got a new character running around my head, his name is Murk.

Murk is awesome. I love Murk. He's my little wizard kid. I'm still figuring this guy out, but I'll post more about him in a later Blog.

Peace out.

School is Closing Out

It is finals week, that terrible mix between being bored-out-of-your-mind and stressed-beyond-belief. Half your classes have nothing going on, while the other half have a test worth ten to fifteen percent of your grade. It imposes a sort of stress related emotional whiplash. On top of this is the anticipation for the summer, because it is so close, but still slightly out of reach. The entire practice is singularly frustrating. I find it unfair that the faculty and system expect the student body to be able to focus on academics and test well under these conditions.

Or maybe I'm just feeling uncharitable because I spent two and a half hours on a test this morning.

Missing Enmar Already

I have just been hit with how much I am going to really, really, truly miss Enmar.

He is the center and core of our Robotics team, and I can't imagine this family without him. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do. I know he's leaving off to "far, far away" to go to college. So this is really the end.

There will never be another FIRST season with Enmar by our side.

The only reason I'm not in happy-sad-sentimental tears is because he is still a part of my Moonbots team. I don't have to say "Goodbye" quite yet. But we're so close to it. And part of it is already older.

He's like a big brother and a good friend at the same time. I will miss the random and rather odd moments of Enmar Affection. Including, but not limited to, rubbing my head or hugging me from behind while yelling "RAPE!".

He had a great sense of humor, a weird laugh, and I wish he hadn't felt so put-upon during his last year here. I really hope he remembers this as a good thing, and not a stressful hunk of yuck.

I'm going to miss all of the seniors next year, and it's looking like there's going to be quite a bit of member changing going on to form a different team... but Enmar still seems to be the major loss for me, because I'm missing him already.

Confrontation

I am absolutely terrified of confrontation. Of any confrontation.

Let's say I go to the bathroom at school. If there's another person in the bathroom I have to wait for them to leave before I can exit the stall because I don't want to have to confront the possibility of talking to them. I know it's stupid, I know nothing at all bad would happen, but it still scares me.

Or I'm at a stop sign and there's another car at the same intersection. I get a panic attack and freeze up because even if I know which of us has the right of way, I still don't know who is going to go first. That's why I failed my first driving test.

And when someone, anyone, catches me doing something wrong, I will lie about it.

I can't help it. It's compulsive. Even though I know it's a terrible idea and it's only going to get me into deeper trouble I am so absolutely terrified of that person being mad at me that I can't tell them the truth and admit I fucked up. I try to lie and smooth it over so they won't get upset with me. I know it will only get worse, but I will still do it. Every. Time.

This is why I try to live an honest life. Not because I think it's the right thing to do (although it is) but so that there won't be any reason for me to lie.

I know where this stems from. I am completely aware this is another offshoot of my Daddy Complex. When I was a kid my dad would could shoulder me and down talk me if I did even the slightest thing out of his taste, and so I desperately tried to cover it up whenever I screwed up.

So, yeah. I know I have a problem. I know why I have a problem. I am willing to admit this and ask for help.

Which means I think it's completely uncalled for that my Mom's initial reaction is to say I'm insulting her by saying talking to her could possibly be a sort of confrontation, and that her proceeding to make fun of me for admitting I even have problems talking to people at school in the bathroom is just mean spirited. I don't know what to say. She and my brother were both laughing, but I was crying. Even if it was a joke, even if my fears are utterly ridiculous and are practically begging to be made fun of... They are still my fears, and they are legitimate enough to me that it hurts me when they are made fun of. If I am crying it is not funny.